One hell of a day

Today started and ended a bit like I imagine Hell would be. These are just random thoughts and stories that have been happening to me all day...

This morning. First day at El Inca, the women's prison here. After being stamped and thoroughly violated (I'm actually kinda embarassed to say) while being padded down, me and the other team members enterted the facility... I was told later that they were especially invasive today.

Thought: wonder what would have happend had a slapped the female fully armed prison gard's hand away?

Ok walk with me inside. It was kinda surreal, it looked like a rundown indoor apartment complex. There were things you'd never see in a US prison. Not that I've seen many myself but still. There was laundry hanging outside to dry and the glass on most of the windows were broken. The prisoners walk around freely for the most part.

Thoughts: Should I have put was instead of were for the glass? Or is it plural? Or is windows the subject. You'd think I'd be better at this after teaching.

Today was para visitas (for visiting? I don't know it sounds wierd). We when into the chapel. I helped lead worship, it went a little less than smooth but I think we were forgiven. Some of the ladies seem really nice and happy to have us there. Some came up and gave us besos. Lots of smiles. I wasn't sure who spoke English and who spoke Spanish, so I mostly just smiled really big! And then there were others, really drawn in. Who knows what they've gone through/going through.

Thought: they really need to come up with better words for wierd and awkward in Spanish. Also apparently sassy can't be translated (I found that out today). But I don't care so much about that one, mostly because I avoid using it in any language.

Then we split up into groups for the the English and Spanish speakers. There are a lot of forieners that get caught trafficking drugs and what not and put there for like a min of like 2 years, some know they are trafficking and some don't. They are then put into this prison and given only a space, no bed, blankets - nothing. They have to buy the rest. They are given $1 for food each day. So these women have to "work." Which usually consists of, you guessed it, prostitution. I was kinda shocked to find out about the lesbianism/prostitution that goes on. I mean I just didn't realized that it'd be so much like a men's prison would be.

So once in the groups we started the Bible study. This one big Nigerian woman was saying her "amens" and such with such gusto that she was almost yelling everything back that the leader was saying!!! The woman leading had to shout the whole time to be heard over her. I was trying so hard to not laugh. I didn't know if she had a mental problem, she seemed simi-normal before that. Then the woman to her right told her to shut up at one point, which was to no avail. And finally when she read one verse about Jesus' salvation (or something like the hope we have in Chirst) she started shouting and shimmying her shoulders !!! and the lady next to her, who had either been ignoring her or irritated by her, lost it and started laughing. Which of course made me lose it, but being behind them I was able to hide.

Thought: Fred Astare was really a homely guy, great dancer but feo.

I didn't get to really talk to them to much but I'm excited to go back now that I know who to say what to. I hope that the gards take it easy on the searching though... que incomodo.

Though: has there ever been a record of a cat committing suicide? If not then I guess I should stop hoping for that...

Had some Mexican food for lunch, well sorta.

Thought: I miss Mexican food the most from home. And In 'n Out. I've already mapped out places I will eat at a.s.a.p. once back home first stop: Double double animal style, ketchup and mustard instead with extra veggies.

Spanish class. Had a different teacher today. Every time I don't have my normal one I feel like a learn more, does that mean I do better when I don't know someone or is my normal teacher just not right for me?

Then Pan de Vida. I hear "Shelli are you going to do anything spicific right now?" (in Spanish) I stupidly answer "No." (in Spanish, maybe if I'd have answered in English I would have saved myself) Then I became the nanny for like 20 ill behaved childern and one continously crying baby. Once told this I accidentally said "I hate kids." Response: really? To which I replied "after this year I do." 2 longest hours of my day. But I got out alive and with only a little bit of snot and pee on me.

Thoughts: I am amazed at this one kid, he kept eatting stuff. And I told him to give the plastic in his mouth to me, he wouldn't. So we had a power struggle for a few minutes before he broke it in half and as a pulled it from his mouth I wondered at how it didn't break his teeth in half!!! His must only have been 6 but already most of his front teeth were rotting out.

I was working in the kitchen with this snotty teenager. He totally picked up food with his fingers and tried and then went back to working! I told him that he should probably wash his hands, I was ignored. How freakin' dare he?! So I tapped on his arm and said "no really you really should wash up before you serve" and he just said yeah and kept dishing up food! I am so mad, just because the people were are serving are poor and probably don't have the same hygene standards does not mean we should just not care about the quality of our service to them! If anything we should be treating them better because no one ever does!

Thought: Geez, I really should never have kids.

I tired walking home at dusk with some girls who were going the same way, key word: Tried. They being younger and in much better shape made it effortlessly up the hill... and well much to my shame, and I was panting by the top of the hill. Could barely remember how to say good bye in English. But once I got home I was free to rest and watch a musical, or so I thought. As I litterally had to unlock our 7 different locks to get in, I seriously thought about just sitting out side the door. Ok I was in, finally. Roommate 1 comes home, status: fair. Roommate 2 comes home, status: poor (in more ways than one). Turns out as she was walking home her and her friend got robbed!!! They took keys, cell phones, book bags (they were coming from Seminary) and his computer! I've heard of this but never seen it until today... she was laughing, like histerically. Then the crying came later. After I sang enough ridiculous songs to lighten the mood we were chatting about why people do stuff like. And the sad reality is all some people have is themselves to depend on, no future hope of heaven so they need to make here as "good" as possible... decieved by greed or necessity. And when you have no hope of heaven maybe it's like hell has already begun?

Thoughts: I've gained 20 stinkin' pounds this year! How did that happen? Just felt the need to share that. Although I'm not really happy about it, I must be sorta proud of it... because I tell pretty much everyone. And I'm not fishing for compliments. Just sayin' ya know?
I don't know how you read this but I had a pretty freakin' awesome day! Not everyone around me did though. Also hope that the theives don't know where we live. I would almost think just getting into the Ecuadorian Fort Knox would deter them from braking in, even with keys... but not everyone is as lazy as me. Also I'm thinking about spell checking this, later.

Shell!

So a couple of weeks ago (back in August) I was able to go to Shell, near the jungle. It was awesome because I got to see Nate Saint's house which was super cool for me. If you remember I was in At Any Cost and I got to represent him in the presentation. Also, I found out that my grandfather went to school with him years before he became a missionary to Ecuador. One of the best parts was at night when all the fireflies where out! It was so amazing. I wonder how God comes up with this stuff?

I've just been so convicted lately. But not quite sure what to do about it or how God wants me to change. I just feel extremely selfish. Kinda ironic, considering that I'm down here to serve. But it's true. I've spent most of the time thinking about how to be more comfortable or when it's not an option just thinking about when I was or will be again. I just don't know if I'm making the kind of connections I should be. Maybe I'm expecting too much out of myself. I needed to sleep early last night but couldn't because of all this. Which put me in a bad place for this morning. I get up to go to work. I've been taking taxis to the south to work at Remanso because taking the bus there is too confusing and kinda dangerous, if I miss it. But this taxista didn't know where I needed to go, I was under the impression that he knew the general area and I even told him what highway to use. No good. He kept asking me and I wasn't sure which way it was to get to that highway and then other people and making lots of U turns... I knew I was in trouble. By this time I missed my first class and was going to miss the second. I'm in tears. I really had no idea what to ask for. I was afraid to ask him to let me out, because I didn't know the area. So finally after the meter was past the point it would have been to get there and over an hour later he just tells me sorry and says I should find another taxi, I get out and don't pay him. And there I am on the street coner (God only knows where) in Quito crying my eyes out. Awesome. I call the teacher I'm supposed to help and tell her I'm lost and going home. She was going to have someone pick me up but I didn't know where I was and I think she thought I was closer to the school than I was (I was still about 40 mins away). I couldn't figure out how to say "I can't stop crying" in Spanish so I just said I can't come, I'm going home, instead. In the words of Eliza Doolittle "I cannn't, I' got an 'eadache."
So I was supposed to post this in September but never got around to it. Two days after this we had the police coup which shut down the airport and all bus transportations. It was crazy. I just stayed in doors for two days and didn't really go out any more than was needed. It was honestly a nice break from working but I was a little worried about my friends who were coming in the next week to visit me. But by the next day the president was un-kidnapped and the country was pretty much back to normal, and my buddies made it here and back safely (well Marlo at least as far as Houston). But the stangest thing about all of this for me is: why is coup spelled with a P? I mean come on... really? I don't care if it comes from French or whatever just help a sista out.

Punch Line

What has happend the last few days that make me love and hate this place:

Went to my 8 o'clock class today, and arrived early. Everyone else showed up at 8:45 or 8:50. I needed to leave at 9 sharp to head to my next ministry sight (PDV). I waited for the pastor because he said he was going partly there, I was so worried he wouldn't leave on time and then I'd be in trouble. But he did. But then he stopped to talk to the police. I almost had a heart attack. Lucky for me it was only a few minutes... there have been times where it's been 30 minutes of "I'm leaving now." I then took and bus to a taxi to Pan de Vida. Made it and early (ok this part isn't so normal)! So after setting up for the yard sale I was put in charge of keeping the people back, passing out food and praying for them. Well I'm willing to pray but it's really hard in Spanish. So I prayed in the language which is easiest for me at the moment, Spanglish! *Side note: that movie "Spanglish" is my movie for this year, I love it. Okay, back to the story, I was trying to pray for someone but messing up my Spanish horribly and there was a guy there who started helping me translate. Then I came over to pray with him... turns out he speaks really good English and lived in the US for a few years but got deported. He worked with a medical mission’s organization but they are no longer in Ecuador and so he is out of work. He asked for prayer for that and for his sister who had just lost a baby. He also asked if he could help volunteer! I was just blown away. I mean if I was out of a job, honestly I don't know if I'd be looking to volunteer, would you?! I mean of course I'm sure he's hoping to build contacts while in search for work, but still! He had such a servant’s heart and he was thanking me for all I was doing. It was really humbling. And as I continued on praying (kinda like a crippled in the spiritual and lingual side of things) I just wondered "who the heck am I to pray for these people?" Me of all people stumbling over my words, hoping the God of the entire universe will hear me. I hope God at least got a good smile out of it!!! But truly I felt so blessed being able to pray for people, that Jesus would use me of all people there. Well after I left there I waited 45 minutes to be picked up (when I was supposed to wait 5). Then got to class and had to wait while they gave a talk about something. So my class started when it should have ended. And there went all my plans for the day because by that time I just had to get back before it got dark. Well I took myself back, and I didn't no the short way so I ended up taking me two hours to get back to the house (I'm soo glad I'm moving on the 8th). The first hour the bus smelled like crap, literally. So nasty. The only saving grace was the wind when the bus moved, until the bus attendant decided to torture me and close it.

One thing that totally shames me is that the people here are so considerate of others in a totally different way than I am. Like it maybe be small but when they get a cookie they bring one for everyone or they'll share. It really is a good lesson for me to think of others... I always feel like a big jerk whenever they offer me something I didn't even think of them! But I'm learning. :)

I was riding home yesterday and this lady rudely told me to move my big bag, right where other people were standing so she could sit (there were no overhead compartments for me to store the bag in). Have they never heard of the word please here??? Then as she climbed over me she hit me in the face with her stupid bad, which I slapped away. I wanted to punch her in the face (side note: I've been using that phrase "I want to punch you in the face" so much lately that I unknowingly though some of my Ecuadorian friends, they think it's funny, I think I have anger issues). So I rolled my eyes as she pretty much sat on me (another side note: I appreciate skinny people here, they can stay on their side of the seat, and the fat ones are all up in my grill! I literally have them sitting partly on my leg and their arms cover mine, when they could easily put it in front of them). Then with in 5 minutes she strikes up a conversation! Can she not tell that I'm seething in anger? So I try to calm down so I can "chat" with her. She asks me all of the usually questions and some really strange ones... I still have no idea what the heck she was saying. I kept telling her I didn't understand so of course she'd repeat the same word the same way, over and over again. I finally told her I don't know that word hoping she'd use another one I'd understand but nope... here the same one comes but slowly this time. Then I did it. I punched her in the face! Okay, maybe that's not true but it would have made for a really good story. So I struggled through awkwardly and thinking to myself "this is going to be a long 1 hour drive." And she almost made me miss my bus stop but repeating that same word for the 4th time during the ride. These are the type of situations that seem small but added up drive me insane. I'm sorry I'm easily annoyed. So much so that when I was a teenager I used the word annoyed so often, my mother made me come up with synonyms (guess I'm not the only one to get annoyed quickly). I've come up with quite a few over the years: irritated, perturbed, frustrated, irked, agitated, you are driving me crazy, I'm going crazy, you make me want to punch myself in the face (see side note above), just to name a few off the top of my head with out looking any up.

I've been thinking about things I miss. Driving. It's been 9 months, I miss it. Never thought I'd say that. but after the last few bus stories I'm sure you understand why. Cottage cheese. Baths. Remembering what it was like to have a night go by and not hear 100 dogs barking. My family. Freedom. Heaters. Non-barred windows. Sleep in the mornings. Warm water. Friends. At the moment, sleep....

Missonaries Cuss

That will be the name of my future book and the sequel will be called Missionaries Cuss, Too. Actually I haven't had too much of a problem with that lately but I've been thinking about that concept for months. I'm not perfect. Sorry to let some of you down... Dad. Just kidding. But seriously, I really do think we tend to put expectations and sometimes unrealistic ones on missionaries or persons of the cloth. I feel so clever using that one... wait is that only for catholics? Any ways, you know what I mean. I resently had a situation come up that affirmed that for me. Other "chirstians" had problems with me, and the funny thing was they were just as responsible for the lack of communication as I was. But I am the missionary so I'm naturally the one at fault. And also one of the wonderful cultural differences here is blame shifting, they're great at it. They didn't knock over the cup, it fell on it's own... se cayo. (I'm sighting Mike for that one, so he doesn't get mad that I stole his words, not that I've ever seen Mike mad). RRRRRRRIGHT.
This all brought me to the conclution of "how much is too much and/or when is enough enough?" and I thought to my self "when I have to ask that quesiton, that's when it's enough!" (Sorry this maybe be a little vague if you aren't getting my prayer emails.) But then agian life is so complicated. No I'M so complicated and a big fat chicken.
Speaking of animals, I'm moving soon! Moving in with two really awesome girls and two very stupid cats. I know they are stupid because they are cats. I met one the other day, I hate it already. Oh and have you seen Meet the Parents? Well like in the movie one of the cats is potty trained to pee in the toilet downstairs but the other goes in the sink! How freaking gross. They must think it's cute or something, I'm never using that bathroom.
VBS went well last week and Pan de Vida. I really love coordinating. I'm kinda good at it too. I think having years of expirience bossing my siblings around must have helped.
Just did lice treatments today (see 2 blogs ago), but I'm pretty sure I was just taking off huge chucks of my scalp instead. I didn't see any piojos so maybe I just had bad dandruff?! How annoying.

Some wires, a lizard and a cockroach

For Kelsey's last week here we went to the beach. It was just her sister, Rebbecca, Kelsey, joined later by our frined Lukas and myself. Fearing for our lives, our "house dad" called his uncle to make sure we got good quality lodgings and were taken care of, as we were to arrive early in the morning. Well we made it safely and then picked up by the uncle, after calling a few times (I bet he was sleeping until we called). Then we got to the most wonderful hostel I've ever stayed in! It was amazing starting with the name "The alpha and omega" and only got better from there. The night lady, which was the day lady too, wouldn't come to the door so we rang for about 10 to 15 mins. Then she proceed to take us to the room which is hands down the dirtiest place I've ever stayed in and I'm comparing that to camping in a tent. It was a pretty muggy day even though it was only 5:30 a.m. and the room was with out air conditioning, luckily I spotted a fan. The fan probably hadn't worked in 4 years, and good thing it didn't because it had about that many years worth of dust and cob-webs on it! I tried it none less, against Kelsey and Rebecca warnings. So the first real night of sleep I was awoken by a loud "whisper" of "Kelsey, Kelsey!" and then a "I don't want to freak you out, but...". So I tore out my ear plugs and sat up! I asked what was going on and Rebecca was trying to inform us that there was a huge bug coming out of the wall. But upon further inspection it was just a bunch of wires. Why she was awake at 2 a.m. looking for bugs I'll never know. The next night was even more interesting. Before going to bed Rebecca spotted a huge gecko on the wall near her bed. We tried to convince her that'd be fine and it wouldn't crawl on her but she wouldn't budge. So I did the only that a person would do in this situation, I threw a lemon at it. Now why did I have a lemon you ask? Good question, you see earlier that night we had been dancing and after fighting off latin salsa kings from inappropriate dance moves, we moved to the sand to just dance by our selves. Thinking to my self "I really shouldn't dance in the sand, there's probably glass" I ignored my good judgment and proceeded to take off my shoes and dance. Well not one minuet later I found my prediction to have come true. Now bleeding from the toe and feeling like a heal, I limped to the bench to wash and inspect the wound. And of course the guys from the bar ran over to help brining me napkins and a few lemons, because why wouldn't I pour fresh lemon juice on my open cut!? Ok back to the hostel. Well it wasn't my best shot, but I was literally an inch from that lizard thingy and couldn't see why it wouldn't run like any normal lizard would! So I took my other lemon and this time pegged it right in the head! Haha! So it moved about 5 inches this time, in between the window panes. Well I guess she was ok with how much we'd been able to move it so we went to bed. Then I was awoken again by a "Kelsey, Kelsey," I then heard "can you come down here so I can kill it, I need moral support." followed by "No, but could you shut the window, so more of those don't get in? Thanks." rolling over I asked what was going on and there was Rebecca sitting up in her bed just have a staring contest with a huge cockroach! So I've heard stories about these things that they don't die very easily, so I found the heaviest thing I could an attempted to kill the darn thing. Well it ran and I screamed like a girl but in the in I was the victor. I am not going to lie I pretty much felt like a warrior after that night.
The other day I was supposed to teach English early in the morning. I was sick the night before with a cold but thought to myself "it's only for an hour, I'll tough it out and then be done." Why aren't things ever that simple? So I get to the meeting spot, I bit late to meet my companion but still on time for class. Well normally if you were in the US we'd just have left to the class on time, but being in Ecuador we had coffee for a half and hour. Okay, that's cool, just an hour and a half and I'll be home. Right? Wrong. So we get to the class 30 mins late, and no one is there! There was a prayer meeting the night before until 3 a.m. so then he wasn't even sure any one was coming. About 15 minuets later a few start to show up. Alright an hour and 45 minuets. Then they finally try to open the door (which is a roll top store front), and continue to try and do so for an hour!!! Then I just couldn't take it any more. I said look guys I'm sick and I really just don't want to wait here any more. So I'm going to wait a few more minuets and then go. I passed out all the assignments and just as I'm about to leave they pull out a huge saw and say "no, no just wait"... ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?! Now maybe I'm not being culturally sensitive but WHAT THE HECK?!
So I need to buy pants. But it's expensive here and want to know something really depressing? I'm the biggest size they sell in the normal stores! It's not that I've gained that much weight, it's just that the sizes run way smaller 9 = 14 in women's. And the last pair of fat pants I bought doesn't even fit me! Geez.
I'm really loving my new job working in the north of Quito, I don't have to teach and it's so amazing! I'm not really looking forward to teaching but hopefully I'll be able to handle it a bit better this year. If there is a school. If you haven't gotten my prayer update email... you might want to get on that I explained more in detail about what's going on with the school. I'm not working at the girls home like I would have liked to but God knows what's going on and so I'm just going to wait it out. I'm still holding on to my dreams of some day working with girls coming out of sex trafficking and prostitution or just any kind of slavery, but am willing to work with the job that I've been given... even it isn't always fun or my ideal situation.

Is louse plural for lice?

Delousing yesterday. Yes you read me correctly. So the first time I noticed lice on a kid was yesterday, it was really bad. I was hugging her close for a bit because she was. As soon as I saw it my head started itching. I don't know if it's all IN my head or just all ON my head. (Funny because I'm pretty sure it's the same either way in Spanish).



A guy short changed my $0.05 (no 'cents' button?) on the bus. He kept arguing with me that it was the right amount, but I've ridden (?) this bus like a million times, he's soooo wrong. Okay, I know doesn't sound like a lot but that's one fifth of my next bus. Jerk.





So I'm starting to not be able to remember English words. They say that's a good stage in learning another language. Only problem is I usually don't know the Spanish counterpart. Uh...



I'm in a weird place right now. No, not Ecuador. I mean in an odd transition and I feel like maybe (or for sure) I bit off more than I can chew. Ministry stuff isn't working out the way I thought a few weeks ago and everything is up in the air. I want to explain but I honestly don't really know yet myself. More on that when I find out.



Got a unexpected trip to Columbia. Sorry mom they didn't have any coffee for sale or I would have bought you some. It was pretty cool. Probably one of the few times blonde Californian girls were smuggled over the border. Oddly enough we were searched a few times coming back into Ecuador, but never asked for papers.

I feel like a rollercoaster

One minute I'm up and the next I'm in a complete loop (or am just loopy). I'm probably like this back at home but I can hide it better.

This last week has been awesome, God's really answered prayers! So where to start? So I met this couple, with I'm pretty sure are the cutest kids in the world, who's been living in the downstairs apartment in the ER building and was chatting with them about their plans for Ecuador. They are helping their aunt and uncle at Casa Gabriel, a ministry here in Quito for street boys. They also want to start a girl’s home for girls rescued out of sex trafficking and similar situations. Right now the only one that exists is secular and it's only for a 3 month period. They have a vision to start one for these girls that is Christian based and that would educate and help them learn a legitimate trade. The girls currently there range in age from 12 to 18. I asked if I could join them in going on Sundays (the only day they are allowed to talk about God). It was perfect because that's the day I have free in the afternoons. Only now I have a hang up, I am no longer able to stay in the ER building which is closer to where this place is and by the time we'd be done I wouldn't be able to bus back to the house I live at. I know it's going to work out, I've been praying about helping in a ministry like this for about a year now. I’m just not sure how it’ll work out yet. I'm so excited to see what's going to become of this! Once I go visit I’ll be able to really tell you all about it.

I wanted to join this 20's Bible study on Tuesdays in the north but again have no way to get back to the house. So on Saturday I was at a party for Day of the Child (I swear they have days for EVERYTHING here) for children with disabilities with one of my friends. I happend to meet someone who goes to the same church and he offered to give me rides! Praise God! So when the group starts back up after summer break, I'll be able to go and get home safely.

Oh and the party for the kids was great. I was asked to be with the hardest kid there (of course, I always have to do things the hard way) but he was super cute. He was a BIG little guy and wasn't really aware of everything around him, social cues and what-not, couldn't really talk, but man could he dance!!! I had a blast with him! We almost won musical chairs but I didn't want to be to completive and squish the other kid, so we let them win.

It wouldn't be blog of mine with out a good bus story. Sorry but the only thing I can think of is that a guy was picking his nose right before taking the money yesterday. Sorry I know that story kinda blows. But please don't be snotty about it, ok? Next time I promise I'll pick a better one.

Still teaching. Still doing house visits. Still have to scream my head off, and yes I did take all the advice given to me, but I have the feeling that people in charge don't really give a crap. Not sure if that's about my class or just in general. Whatever. It's just something I'll have to endure through. House visits, as it turns out, aren't always with single mothers, but some of their husbands are out of the city or country. They are hard to do, it's really hard to sit and do almost nothing for 3 to 4 hours... believe it or not. I don't know how much longer I can do it... or not do it? LOL. Any ways, I was feeling really bad for myself today, and after calming the ocean pouring from my face I went into to teachers lounge to sit and wait for my companion for visits. This week is spiritual emphasis week and the teachers were in there talking and crying. Not sure what was said before I entered but listening to the prayers that followed, I figured I'm not the only one having a hard time. I mean how does one deal with kids whose parents aren't there or who's teeth are visibly rotting out of their heads?! How are those kids supposed to pay attention? I feel like some of the problems are so easily fixed, but where does it stop? There are so many problems that could be helped a lot with just so little. And some only God Himself could help. How much am I supposed to do? After all I can't help everyone... right?

Poverty sounds awful, but it looks even worse.

Random Day

Workers day today. People were striking in the streets, I would think today of all days you'd want to not strike... just saying. We had the day off, well sorta. Long story, you wouldn't like to hear it. Ran it to this random guy we meet last month, Kelsey said he was totally into me. Apparently he asked us out dancing but said that he had a friend for her. Then some guy tried talking to us in English, while following down the street. So I thought it'd be super funny to start talking in French. So then he starts talking to us in French, we don't respond but I was laughing my head off! Who the heck is this guy!!! So much for trying to be clever. So the class I was supposed to teach (even though I was scheduled off today... ?) got cancelled so we went to a little cafe to get some coffee. And EVERYONE kept staring at me! Then the really drunk old lady who was chugging half a gallon of yogurt with her bread was really into the stories I was telling. She kept laughing and making motions to me when I would tell an interesting part. I'm also positive she knew no English what-so-ever! She also started waving at me at one point, for no reason. Then this guys walks in to the cafe with a dried cow head, you know the kind you'd mount on a wall? He sets it down and ordered some bread... I was telling a really creepy story but couldn't help busting out laughing. Then we arrived early to pick up the teenagers for the sleepover we are having right now. Don't ever, ever arrive early in South America. Especially when you are wearing sandals and a skirt and it is raining. 1 hour. I still can't feel my feet. The "wedding singer" just got done shouting his songs so now hopefully I'll be able to sleep.

Hospital

I guess I should give you a little back ground as to how I got there. Oh and by "there" I mean Vosandes, a big missionary hospital in Quito. So you remember the "death soup" right? Well after eating that, I never quite fully recovered and combined with a few other sketchy meals must have been what did me in. But who really knows?

This last Tuesday I started feeling funny, not like I wanted to tell jokes but more like I wanted to throw up on the guy smoking next to me. He would have deserved it too. We were at a soccer game, Quito vs. Uruguay and apparently every sports fan in Quito loves to smoke. I might have had a fever then but it was cold and raining in the outdoor stadium, so I couldn't really tell.

The next morning I dragged my self to work and got dragged to this lady's house so she could make breakfast, we were supposed to be doing house visits. Then she showed me her garden and guinea pig farm. I fell on the muddy mountain side. But what else is new? That was the 5th time falling for me last week, a record even for me. Well by this time I was really feel bad, pretty sure I had a fever. Asked to go by a store for medicine. We didn't. Went on one house visit but I sat in the chair and had no energy to get up and play with the little kid. So I went home early and suffered through one of the worst colds I've had in a while.

Next day, Thursday, I went to the doctor. But in my sickened stupor didn't think to ask for an English speaking doctor. So not every thing was really taken care of just the main cold but not the underlying stomach stuff, which wasn't so bad (or so I thought). Friday, woke up before my alarm, sicker than a dog! Oh and Friday I was supposed to go to Manta to visit Nick and the orphanage he's working at. So off to the doctor's I went, again. Worst day ever. Fast bumpy ride there. Sick all over again upon arrival. Then from 9 a.m. to 6 p.m. on the worlds smallest exam table. After jabbing me several times to find phantom veins I'm finally IVed and a few tea spoons short of blood. Then after not being able to get my fever down (which took them until mid day to finally catch with thermometer) they sent me over to the hospital for over night observation and to figure out what was going on with me. Oh yeah, I'm sure you've guessed by now but I didn't go to Manta.

Get to the hospital. It's perfect, like out a movie. I'm looking down the halls filled with sick and well people walking or being pushed up and down it. All that's missing is some tinsel and some huge tacky Christmas ornaments hanging off the walls. A nice woman helps me when something falls over of mine. A baby walks around for 5 mins whispering "papa" the whole time. I mention this to the clerk who gets up looks around then sits back down uninterested, oh Ecuador. Baby found by mother. I want a coke at this point, I think "I hope I can have coke with this." Mayra rolls her eyes at me because she's more frustrated than I am at how long the sign in process is. Guy walks in with two pizzas and a coke. A cold coke. They never had cold coke here! I sighed. Then off to my room in a wheel chair, I kinda liked it, not going to lie. My room was alright, normal but no T.V. I was glad, it'd probably more annoying that any thing. Didn't sleep much that night, monitor kept going off and the buzzer was out of reach, nurses, blood drawn, in and out or pain, fever/chills, medication, roommate that sounded like Darth Vader when it slept, yes it.


Now Christine has reassured me that I'm not strange for thinking this, but I've always thought it'd be kinda exciting staying in a Hospital! But she did bring up a good point, in all of these day dreams being sick isn't really the main point. Well Christine, it's not worth it, I'll tell you that right now. They don't always come when you want them to or bring you want you want and you're still sick the whole time. In fact once I told a nurse that I was very cold and wanted another blanket, so she promptly pleaded off the warmer of two blankets off my bed and started to leave saying I had a fever and needed less heat! I swear if she was on my IV side I would have choked her out!!! I begged and got my old one back but no new one's.


Friday was the worst, Saturday not much better. It was pretty much the same as Friday night's list of events sprinkled with a visits from the family I live with. Mayra looking after me all the while.

Sunday was better, I wasn't as bad but still not better. They said I still had to stay. Got moved to a new room with better chairs and a balcony and a roommate from the states who had a worse time of it than I did! So apparently I'm not good at resting because I bent my IV needled in an L shape inside my elbow. So because they ruined every other part of my arms they had to insert a new on in my hand! Every finger movement brought a shot pain up my arm. You should see my track marks and bruises now.

They let me go back to the house on Monday. I'm not perfectly well but on the mends, I guess. I guess some good things that came out of it. I got to practice Spanish, although the vocabulary I picked up I hope I won't have to use in very many social situations! I'll never wonder what it's like to stay in a hospital, ever ever again. Probably never prayed "God help me" more times in one time period, I really had to depend on Him not just talk like I do. And the best thing of all: I GOT THREE HOT SHOWERS!

My life, it's kinda like a bad movie with some funny parts

So I just had the most awkward situation ever. I came back to the house after working and one of the workers here (they always seem to be having construction of some kind) was trying to talk to me. I thought he was trying to tell me something about my room and when I walked in to ask him what's up, he followed me and closed the door slightly and sat down and started to chat away! So I got my stuff to make lunch and walked out, then he heard the "boss" coming and told me to "shh" and walked quietly back to work! Then after that he came back and wanted me to sit down and talk with him. After asking my name and saying it was nice to meet me officially he reached over to give me what I thought was a customary greeting (a kiss on the cheek) but he gave me an awkward hug and tried to hold on for a bit. Then I didn' t know whether I should laugh or run away... so I pushed away and asked for his name and then promptly got up to make lunch while he talked to me, instead of doing his work. So here I am hiding in my room (oh by the way I have my own room with a bathroom now, if I forgot to mention that) waiting for 6 o'clock.



I saw a old guy with really swollen hands on the bus today. Well mostly just the fingers, but not like when a person has arthritis. I wonder what it was? I always see such strange things on the bus. I need to keep a bus journal.



So on Good Friday I ate this soup that they only have for Easter (Pascua) called Fanesca. It's 12 ingredients to represent the 12 disciples of Christ. I helped make it but mostly sat around and watched a Moses cartoon in Spanish. Well the soup was great. I loved it when I first ate it, but about 10 mins after eating it I pretty much hated it. So after praying and taking one Imodium I sat through 4 and half hours of church (a total of about 5 and a half hours of being there altogether). One of the worst days of my life. The poor kid that walked in while I was in the bathroom after eating what I now call "death soup" is going to have nightmares for life. I couldn't even yell at him to get out right away because I was puking. Such is my life.

And a strange life it is at that. I mean I've been thinking about it and it almost seems like it's not really my real life. Just a fake one for the time. I mean it's a year. I kinda started a new life here but then go home and restart all over again. It's a weird concept. I don't think this makes much sense.

I need to get motivated to speak Spanish, I've gotten lazy. I think was in a bit of a funk. Feeling really out of place here not sure how I fit in being white and not speaking much Spanish.

Oh and that's another thing, being a minority. Such a strange experience. I mean there is no settling or feeling normal. I get mistreated or worshiped. I'm not sure which is worse. I stick out like a sore thumb, and I'm always conscious of that fact. People rip me off, cut me off in lines, or ignore me because of how I look. The other day I blew up a cab driver because I thought he was ripping me off (turns out he wasn't) because half of them always try. I won't even mention the stupid cat-calls and whistles. I hate it.

I hate Big Mac's

To give a little bit of back ground: I just got back from Peru last week and was pretty sick and unfortunately as of today I'm still not any better. When I don't eat I feel O.K. but then that has it's problems too. So at the project this morning, after not eating or sleeping much for 4 days in a row, I started to feel pretty tired, dizzy and couldn't see to well. I felt like a useless blob there because I just sat around for like 5 hours doing nothing. So finally I got my test results back so I could get some medicine for whatever it is. And as I was having the family translate it for me they simply said "oh, it's nothing." Well I can tell you all for a fact that it's not "nothing" and hearing that made me reply (spoiler warning: this gets pretty graphic), "but I think I might at least have worms!" to which was replied, "oh that's normal here, everyone has that." And fuming words not to be re-uttered under my breath, I almost replied "WELL! In The United States of America WE DON'T have worms!" Luckily, I thought about how ridicuals that statement sounded and didn't say it. I was given a medicine for the second time this week that I'm even sure what it is or if it'll work, don't think I'll die from them but don't be surprised if I come back home with an extra toe and side burns. Then the person who was to take me to the class I was waiting all day to teach (the only reason I even stayed at the school) was late (not a surprise, just annoying). So he decided that we wouldn't go. But I had had it and asked if we could go anyways. We did. I taught and got out two hours later than I should have but I just couldn't take not being on schedule today. I just couldn't be flexible!!! I just wanted to fly home for the day. Because in America "WE DON'T have worms!"!!! So what did I do? I went to MacDonald's and bought a Big Mac so I could take my mystery pills. I hate Big Mac's. In fact, I don't really care for MacDonald's either. Any hoo, I'm sure I'll be back to being more agreeable tomorrow, I was just really over it all today! :)
(And don't feel bad for me, I'm laughing at this all now).

This story is a a testament of how much I've been adapting to living here. I mean I would never in my right mind share in a large group anything pertaining to my intestines... but I think once you become a missionary down here it becomes dinner conversation. And I'm not even kidding!

In all seriousness, I am doing so much better than I have been (besides being sick)! I really see that God has been helping me with my attitude internally and I have gotten a chance to practice being thankful in situations you wouldn't think to be thankful in. I think God's amazing because there is no way I'd ever be able to pull positive out of the situations that I normally get frustrated about (even today I was able to praise God for things in an "off day" but it made a better story to leave them out!). God is really blessing me and sending me rest and stuff to look forward to. Example, I'm getting more days off this week for Easter (Semana Santa) than I first thought!!! Also, I'm understanding way more Spanish. I finally feel like I'm warming up to people and that I'm starting to get my personality back with them. Even today when I was feeling so useless I got to just hug my adorable little girls. Perhaps that's what they really needed, but I think that's what I really needed today. So thank you God for rest, little kids, having to be dependant because I don't know anything, and even for being sick (because I realize how lucky I am normally).

I'll try to spell check this with an "English speaking" computer so it's easier to read, but no promises, just love me for the bad writer and speller I is. ;)

Peru

So I just got back from Peru yesterday. Extreme Response took a team from Canada to another Remanso in Trujillo and we helped construct part of an unfinished church there. The place was called New Jerusalem and we were building on sand, which was challenging. We did a lot of work but mostly pouring foundation and it kinda looked worse once we left than when we started! LOL. But it was the hardest part so hopefully they'll (the church members in Peru) be able to do the rest before the group comes back to finish it next year. They almost finished to roof, so all in all it was a successful week.

I've been sick for the last four days, but what else is new?

I've been doing a lot of praying and soul searching to see exactly what God wants me to do here with the challenges I'm facing while teaching English. So far I haven't gotten any answers, so I'm just hanging in there and looking for ways to use gifts I do have and incorporated them into my teaching. So hopefully I'll have peace or direction. I pray I can at least make it the rest of the new quarter with out going insane, just three more months!

Other than that life goes on the same here, lots of adjustments. Getting use to doing things illogically or the slow way... well I don't know if I ever will really get used to it, but I try to be patient at least. And I still hate 5:30 a.m. LOL.

A day in the life of...

Just some thoughts I've had and things that have happened to me on any givin' day here and I thought I should make note of them...



The other day while waiting for the bus I got hit in the face with water. They have a Holiday here called Carnival, right before Lent and for two days there are waters wars. Except people start early so it's most of the month. I guess I should count my lucky stars because in some places they throw flour and eggs. A friend of mine in France informed me the other day that they have the same Holiday but they feast and make pancakes. So I was thinking maybe people here really just want to make pancakes (although he could have been teasing me knowing I love pancakes, so I'm not sure how trust worthy the info is)!!!



After being hit by water I got on the bus and was sitting next to a lady whose hands were covered in dried blood. I stared at them. I didn't feel rude because people like to stare here. Maybe it's a combination of culture + me being white. So she slowly hid them behind her purse. I'll never know why washing blood off wasn't a priority to her but I still can't help but wonder.



Yesterday, I was on my way to my first Spanish lesson in the north of Quito. I had my big ol' backpack and was carrying a purse too (I had my day off so I had spent the night in the north, thus the reason I had all that junk with me). I got on the trolley. It soon became packed with people so I moved to the corner to try and keep from being robbed. Well I got kinda pushed over and only had my back to the window. Two women were practically on top of me. For some reason I felt my purse move in front of me so I moved it over and heard my stop and got off. Then I realized it wasn't my stop after all! So as I waited for the next trolley I discovered the hole in the side of my purse!!! I investigated and found nothing of importance missing! Praise God! But still rather unnerving. Then I continued on my way to my lessons with my "map" in hand. Well the directions weren't... uh how do I say this... correct (or I really can't read street signs). Either way I knew something wasn't right so I called and was told I was going the right way but had to keep on going on a bit. Well that was after 20 mins of what should have been 10 or less, and I was telling myself the whole time... "I'm sure it's just a few blocks more." So 45 mins later I got a taxi, to the wrong address and then had them come out and find me! My conclusion is I'm taking a stinkin' taxi from here on out!!!



So I've also come to the conclusion that children are like alcoholic beverages, best in small quantities if at all. Working with the boys I had last year changed my idea on having not ever having kids (I love them soooo much!) but I have to say working with mass amounts of children now has won me back over to the dark side. I don't know, maybe I'm just tired out from my "day of rest" yesterday.

I hate having to yell so that I can be heard in a room full of only 5 or 6 kids.



I hate when people tell me to be clam, because more than likely I wasn't really upset only wanted to know something with my usual fervor... but once they say that THEN I start getting upset. Not sure why the word "clam" tends to have the opposite effect on me.



I'm just going to start telling the taxi drivers I'm married, it's just easier that way.



I got told I was going on a date the other day, not asked. He didn't call though, told me that he didn't have mins on his phone. I hope that's always the case. Or else I'm always going to have to wash my hair or be extremely tired on the weekends for the next year.

Good news, Bad news

These last two weeks have been up and down. I have gone from being excited to see a good firend (Nick) to crying my eyes out for a few hours over huge miscomunications. I don´t know how much I´ll share on here but it´s been interesting to say the least!

Good news:
Last week I started house visits. I really enjoyed it. As I walked along the highway to meet the woman I´d be accompaning, my guide and I spied two blue hearts on the road. You see, there are a lot of people who get killed walking on the roadways here and the blue hearts are like the little crosses you`d see in the U.S. Pedestrians don´t have the right of way here, but there aren´t many safe places for them to walk and the drivers are just plain awful! Any ways, so as we crossed over the hearts, and I´m not over exagerating, a huge simi-truck wizzed passed with in a few inches of us!!! But I´m glad to report I´m not a blue heart and we continued on to the houses. Some of the houses I vistited were really dark and dank, similar to what you would think a dungon would look like. Often the only piece of furnature was the bed which we sat on to do the Bible study and play with the kid or kids. Some where nicer but for the most part where all made up of sement. Because I don´t speak English I just played with the kids so the moms could do the Bible study. It was a nice break from teaching English and I acctually felt like I was doing something useful (instead of spending an hour at a time stuggling with kids to get them to sit down and listen). I came home smelling like mold and who knows what else, I can´t imagin having to live like that. Really makes you check yourself and appricate what you have.

Bad news:
Not to scare anyone but a teacher at the school got hit by a car this week on his way to work, luckily he servived. I had trouble understanding the exactly what happend but I know he was hopitalized and is either at home or in jail (it´s illigal here to cross the street if there is a bridge, so aparently the driver that hit him is pressing charges). Also there has been a lot of miscomunication from a lot of ends and has caused me some major and needless grief. Then there are other situations that are completely out of my hands and out of control which are hard to stand by and watch. That´s all I can say but it´s for sure not good.

Good news:
God´s still in heaven. Also, I might be figuring out a better schedule so I can a least have a couple days off a month (because my "day off" is only a half day and I´m mostlikely going to have Spanish class for a few hours that day). And hopefully I will get to go to a church and possibly have a Bible study with the Extreme Response (ER) people. I got to visit centeral Quito yesterday with a few of the girls from ER. I had a blast! A rude lady wouldn´t let us see the basillica towers that we paid for, even though we had 10 mins to climb up. So we went down and snuck back up another way... I´ve never ran up so many flights of stairs in my life! She tried chasing us, but gave up being older and well... fat. We made it to the top at the exact moment the bell chimed!!! It was beautiful! We took our vitcory picture and climbed down. You should have seen her face! When then looked at some other cathidrils and went to the Rotunda (spelling?) street in Quito, which is beautiful at night, so quaint it could almost be out of a movie. I got to see the middle of the world with Nick which was pretty cool (I´ll try to put pictures on FB, I´m not really sure how to post them on here). And I took a nap today after an emotionally haggerign week, thank God for naps and being able to stay at the very quiet ER building one night a week!

Bad news:
Just found out that you shouldn´t put any comerical value on things that are sent to me because I´ll have to pay huge fines to get it. And worst of all... I´m writing with a Spanish keyboard and the spell check isn´t working, so this post is probably not going to be readable!

Small things

Good news! I have a schedule worked out now. I'll be working at the school 3 days a week teaching English, 3 days at Compassion International after school program, 2 to 3 days helping teach English at a few different seminaries, one day of house visits to single moms, and helping out with Sunday school at the church. I must confess, with some hesitation at being judged, that God's been showing me my selfishness, because I'm battling the thoughts of having no time and getting really burnt out (which happens a lot, I'm told). I know I'm here to serve, but I wonder just how much can one person do in a week? Any ways, I do have Mondays off, so on Sundays I'll go to the Extreme building (about an hour away by bus) and spend the night so I can sleep in at least until 8:00. Then I'll hopefully get Spanish lessons and maybe meet with a mentor on Mondays.
Getting up at 5:30 everyday can be really exhausting, especially to a person who generally thinks getting up at 9:30 a.m. on a Saturday is unreasonable and/or unheard of. So with that said, I was extremely tired by about 12:30 yesterday and truly felt like I couldn't make it through the rest of the program. I had no idea what classroom I was to help with (and I now know I was also fighting off being sick). In tears I locked myself in the bathroom at the school praying and trying to pull myself together. Finally I left but once outside no one seemed to be around and I started panicking again. Then out of no where one of the girls in the preschool class beckoned me upstairs, told me to sit down and just watch the kids play while she went to do something and I understood all of it! Small as it may have been, it was an answer to my desperate prayer to be able to get through the rest of the day. And that's how I'm taking things now day by day which is probably a better way to do it any how!

Out of Control

So have you ever had that feeling like the fact that you are completely uncomfortable is a complete waste? I have. I mean I know that it's not, but that's how I feel. Still not quiet sure what I'm doing on a day to day basis. I'm currently not helping with house visits like I first thought, although that could still change. I'm really hoping I'll be able to do it if it's God's will... I think it'd be much more fun than teaching (but then again I have no idea).
The little girls here are my saving grace. They are so affectionate and just hugging them sometimes gives me something to do when I'm unsure of my place or what to do. A few of them have really taken to me and it's just been great.
I really love the food here. There's only been a few things I haven't liked. I'm totally going to get fat! I'm not going to have my own kitchen like I first thought so it's a lot of soup, rice and potatoes for me! They really love to drink hot thick drinks here. They have one called "quacker" which is basically Quaker oatmeal ground up! Most of them are good, just have to be prepared for texture. The other day I was hot from being out in the sun for a few hours and saw that they were serving kool-aid or punch of some sort. When I went to drink it I got a surprise, it was more like jello instead of fruit punch!
I took a taxi all by myself today. I have to say I'm a bit proud. All I did is some shopping at the mall and then back home again. It's funny to have the sales people talk to me, I have no idea what they are saying. Sometimes I pretend to understand.

Sick Day

So I'm at the house sick today which is giving me a chance to update this.
Life here has been constant changes, so it's hard to fall into a grove. I have my school/teaching schedule but it is probably going to change over the next few weeks because of possible house visits which I'm currently not doing. I have a lot of gaps in the schedule and I'm not sure what to do with all that time during the school days. My living situation has been kind of up in the air... I was initially supposed to have my own room in a flat in the first floor but I'm living in the study and the other northern American girl living here gave up her bed to me and is sleeping in the little girls room at the house. They are building on another room for us to share, but not quite sure when that's going to to be finished.
The culture is very different from the U.S. especially when it comes to personal space and privacy. There isn't much. They also greet each other with one kiss on the cheek, which I really like because makes me feel welcome, being an outsider and not speaking the language makes me feel really awkward a lot of the time. I'm hoping and praying for Spanish lessons so I can start communicating better. Most of you wouldn't know me here, I'm so shy and quiet because even if I had something to say I'm unsure of how to say it. I try not to take to heart the giggles at my horrible Spanish, but I've got to be honest it doesn't encourage me to keep trying. The other night I had people practically yelling and repeating words and phrases to me and I have no idea why... it was really frustrating but now it's kinda comical. Sometimes I've got to repeat "don't cry" over and over, but I'm told that feeling is just part of the culture shock.
It's really beautiful here! I haven't had my camera with me on the really clear days but it's amazing! Volcanoes and mountains all around with a lot of eucalyptus trees and a few pine-types as well. I live in the south which is considered the poorer area but can still be really beautiful.
I feel like I'm kind of crazy for doing this, but then I have to remember that I'm really in love with Jesus and that's the driving force behind this. I'm really truely excited to find out how he's going grow me and use me in others lives.
Thanks for the prayers guys, I really need it! I welcome any emails or letters too, I haven't had a chance to get home sick yet but I know it's just a matter of time.

Prayer:
Spanish lessons and conprehention of the language
Getting over the sickness I currently have
That the room situation would come together soon or whatever God's will is for it

Until next time...

Pre-Ecuador

I never know how to start these things. Well let's see how about I go back to 2009. I was having trouble getting ahold of the Justice Department to get my fingerprint paper work back so I could apply for my visa to Ecuador. Finally after a month after not getting through they finally sent me paper work, the wrong ones but at least I was getting somewhere. Long story short I got my visa on the 23rd about a week and a half before I left for South America.

I visited my friend Maia in Chile, and had a really good transition into Latin American culture. Let's just say I've never stuck my hand in a toilet so many times as a I did the 5 days I was in Chile. You see, if you didn't know, you can't and/or aren't supposed to flush paper. Sigh. But I am proud to report I'm getting the hang of it now. When it came time to leave I was given directions and written phrases so I could get the correct buses back to the air port. Once on the bus I read Little Women, which I brought for the trip, and a random verse popped up: in love there is no fear. This came in handy for the rest of the day, but at the moment I didn't think much of it. It turns out, I ended up at a slightly different bus stop than we first thought. So after walking a few blocks the wrong way with ridiculously heavy baggage, and tears in my eyes (repeating the verse over and over to keep from crying) I turned around and went back and tried out my Spanish at the bus stop I was dropped off at. After asking and then asking again, I found the correct bus. My troubles were over and I could now rest, right? Right... well apparently you can be too early to check in. So I was told the flight was already bored which didn't make sense (the woman didn't really speak much English) and then I was told to wait. Then 10 minuets later the lady "helping" told me the flight was full. I told her I already had go tickets a while before and somehow magical after arguing I had tickets again. She told me to weigh my bags and one had too much weight, so I tried to repack. Then she told me that it was the other bag was too much, so I was repacking the wrong bag. Then I tried to put it into my backpack and at this point I was tired (I should mention at this point that I had only slept for 2 and a half hours because of the stupid rooster outside the house the night before) and hot. Finally someone who spoke English came over and told me that the bags where too much altogether and I'd have to pay $165 USD to check the bags. I burst into tears (funny now, not so much then). I have to say that the flight was smooth and I arrived safe and sound (well somewhat) in Quito, Ecuador.